Did you know that building your self-confidence is a skill not a gift? But here’s the thing…

Your branding is gorgeous. (Of course, it is, if Vicki Nicolson has had anything to do with it!)

You have captured your personality perfectly in your colours, images, font and your brand new logo.

You’re probably excited to show it off. And of course, I encourage you to do so.

BUT… what if you get stuck?

It’s scary to put ourselves out there, isn’t it? When you’re running your own business, (especially if you’re the face of your business), then having to be visible can be downright terrifying.

Writing a blog or a sales page is bad enough. Having to put your photos on your social media posts feels totally uncomfortable.

But video? Facebook Live? YIKES! No chance!

  • You’re worried you look fat and ugly.
  • You’re anxious, you sound like an idiot and your accent is awful.
  • You fear you make words up, hesitate too much and lose your point.
  • You’re totally out of your comfort zone. You don’t understand the tech or how to make the background look good.
  • You don’t know how to be at ease on camera and need a script. But the script is too long and then makes you look uptight.
  • You’re worried about trolls, that you’ll be laughed at and judged.
  • You’re scared people who know you will watch it and that makes you cringe.
  • You’re nervous no-one will watch, that you’re not interesting and have nothing new to add.

That does sound terrifying!

What if I told you, you could be confident?

  • You’ve learnt to build an email marketing list.
  • You’ve learnt to create ebooks in Canva.
  • You’ve learnt to schedule posts and write blogs.

You learn to be confident in the same way.

Self-Confidence is a skill you can learn NOT a gift you are born with.

It’s completely and totally freeing when you realise that you can LEARN to be confident.

Let me share with you the biggest confidence lesson I’ve learnt.

We are all mad.

We’re all totally obsessed with being seen as successful, confident and clever, that we end up totally threatened by things that may bring it into question. We can’t tell our employees we’re having a bad day because our cat just died – they might see us as unprofessional. We must always look immaculate for meetings because even looking remotely scruffy might deem us incompetent. We can’t be seen to not know the answer in the presentation or… the list goes on.

Wow! Do we set the bar high?! In The School Of Life’s book On Confidence, the author shares that we actually have a skewed picture of how dignified a normal person might be. We almost believe it’s actually possible to live a life where things don’t go wrong, where we always look perfect and everyone likes us. How wrong we are! The thing is EVERYONE has faults, everyone makes bad judgements, everyone accidentally snorts when they laugh.

Everyone is stupid, everyone is faulty and everyone has fear. Let’s remember we are all mad, we all make mistakes. Sorry to tell you, but you’re not unique!

You don’t have to be perfect

How freeing it is to know you don’t have to be perfect?! Learning self-acceptance is at the heart of being confident. When you accept that you’re perfectly imperfect, you will make mistakes and you are as mad as everyone else, everything seems lighter and easier. It makes writing that blog, creating that social media post or even that scary Facebook live just seem that much more achievable doesn’t it? Still scary, yes. But achievable.

Confidence isn’t about never being scared. Not at all. Confidence is about learning to tolerate fear. The more you are exposed to scary situations the easier they become to cope with.

Take a moment to pause and reflect on how confident you feel in business? Are you happy that you are showing up visibly and authentically? Is there room for improvement?

Your branding was designed to reflect you.

You ARE your brand. Therefore, YOU need to show up loud and proud, bright and sparkly in your business.

People connect better with real, natural, authentic leaders, as opposed to perfect and polished. It makes your life, your lessons and your products seem more obtainable and develops true know, like and trust factor. When people connect with you, they are most likely to buy from you too!

Your job now is to learn to be confident. It’s no different than learning any other business skill – except this one will totally transform your happiness. I challenge you to do one thing today to improve your confidence. Contact a coach, read a blog, download a podcast, buy a book. Do something to start learning that skill.

Hayley x

How to Build Self Confidence It's a Skill NOT a Gift pin

About Hayley

Hayley Gillard teaches women in business how to be confident. She prides herself on being real, authentic and totally herself (warts and all), and shows you how to love and accept yourself, so you can be more visible in your business.

Her course Fear of Facebook Live has a 100% success rate, and she works with women internationally through her one to one coaching. You can join her free, private, Facebook community Self-Belief School here.

 Find out more at www.hayleygillard.com .

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